The Importance of Sabr

Salaam

Sabr, or patience, is a very important trait that, unfortunately, many Muslims fail to comprehend. On average, we yell the loudest, punch the hardest, and are pretty much the most immature out of every other race/religion in the whole world. What a sad tale.

The other day, I was at the Masjid and there was an event going on. There are two main rooms, a banquet hall and a prayer hall where the actual prayer goes on. Both have glass doors and are right in front of each other, so it's easy to see what's going on. Here's a very crude Microsoft Paint depiction of the place, with green being the prayer hall (the arrow is the Qiblah direction), red being the banquet hall and yellow the glass doors.


In the banquet hall, there was some sort of community meeting and I was also present. Isha was at 8 pm. At adhaan time, the meeting was still going on. Some people had started to gather in the prayer hall and gave the adhaan while someone was talking. The meeting was delayed for a little bit, but a man went into the prayer hall and turned off the mike. 5 minutes later, while the meeting was wrapping up, the people who had gathered in the prayer hall started a Jama'ah without consulting the Imam, who was in the meeting. The mike was turned off the whole time, and the ladies couldn't hear a thing over in the women's side.

The Imam and everyone else who was present at the meeting went into the Masjid when the prayers were in the last Rak'ah. As soon as they finished, a man, let's call him Dr. X (even though that's not his name), went up and asked them... well, more like told them to go to the back so they could have a second Jama'ah - without even waiting a single second. One of the people who had been praying, let's call him Red-shirt White-beard (you can probably find out his appearance from that) got extremely angry.

If you have seen an argument, you know what it looks like. Two people begin talking and each wants to cut each other off louder than the other and the volume soars. But this was no normal fight. Immediately, Red-Shirt White-beard, or RW, began to yell and a lot of people began to yell back. This is what he said:

"What!!! You're trying to tell us to go in the back????? We didn't even get a chance to say Subhanallah!!!!" By this he meant he didn't get a chance to finish saying "Subhanallah" 33 times, yet alone start "Al Hamdulillah" or "Allahu Akbar" 33 and 34 times respectively. The volume kep rising. "Don't tell me to go back!!!!!!!! You get out of the Masjid!!!!!!!!" By "you" he meant Dr. X - who was also saying something but we couldn't hear over RW. "This isn't your Masjid, Dr. X!!! You can't make me do anything!!!!"

Everyone in the Masjid had their head turned in that direction, and a crowd was gathering around trying to make sure that RW didn't really blow it. The last thing we needed was blood on the carpet. Dr. X came forward and put his hand on RW, who was still sitting down in prayer position. Big mistake. RW exploded. "GET YOUR HAND OFF ME!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T TOUCH ME, DR. X!!!!!!! IT'S NOT YOUR MASJID!!!!!!!!!"

As RW caught his breath, Dr. X finally had a chance to say something. "It is my Masjid, it's all our Masjid. You have been coming here for only two months now; I've been here for years!"

RW stood up and began to argue back. "I come here for Isha every day! Every day! I don't see anyone else who is here right now in Isha- no one. Not you, not you, you..." at this point he pointed at couple people, including me. "Look at the time for Isha!" He pointed to a sign on the wall that had all the timings written on it. "8 o'clock! Look at the time now." It was, as far as I can remember, 8:17 or so.

RW had by now gotten up close and personal with Dr. X and pointed his finger close to his face. "It's not your Masjid, Dr. X!!!"

Now a man who had been standing next to me watching the fight spoke up as RW was leaving the prayer hall. "SHUTUP!!!!!!!!" He screamed it. Another guy nearby told him to cool it in a very, uh, unsubtle manner.

RW was walking toward the exit in the back, but he wasn't done yet. He pointed at Dr. X. "Enjoy your Masjid, Dr. X!!! I hope you do, because I'm never coming here ever again!!!"

When RW was finally gone, Dr. X said, "Someone who has only been coming here for only two months or so can't think that's he's the boss." The Imam went up to his area, and everyone else lined up. But he had a quick word to say, too.

"Arguing and raising your voice in the Masjid is forbidden in Islam, people. We should always keep that in mind." I couldn't agree more. Once the prayer was over, he added an extra two percent. "When there's an event in the Banquet Hall going on, you shouldn't start a Jama'ah without consulting me. We'll try to wrap things up as quick as possible and come and pray as a group. One time the Prophet, Peace Be Upon Him, delayed the Jama'ah so much some of the Sahabah were left waiting for hours. So always check with the Imam before starting if there's an event going on in the Banquet Hall."

I'm not saying anyone that night was an angel. Dr. X and others should have waited a bit before jumping up and asking.... I mean telling the other people to go to the back. And RW was just paranoid. The man who yelled "shutup" didn't help put out the fire, either. In fact, he just fueled the flames. He could have tried to resolve the situation a little instead of making it worse. As for RW's behavior, I have no comment. He's a grown, mature man and it's people like him who are representing Islam in America today. What a shame.

There were kids present on that day, too. What did they learn? To yell and scream? Or to be polite? What will they do when they're older?

I'd like to end this very long post with a few ahaadith.

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“I guarantee a house in Jannah (Paradise) for one who gives up arguing, even if he is in the right; and I guarantee a house in the middle of Jannah for one who abandons lying even when joking / for the sake of fun; and I guarantee a house in the highest part of Jannah for one who has good manners.” (Prophet Muhammad (صلي الله عليه وسلم) - reported by Imam Abu Dawud)

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Sa’eed bin Musayyeb says: Once the Prophet was sitting with his Companions, and one person used insulting words against Abu Bakr (may Allah be pleased with him), causing him pain. But Abu Bakr remained silent. The person again used bitter words against Abu Bakr, and still Abu Bakr did not respond. The third time when this ignorant person hurt Abu Bakr with his tongue, Abu Bakr tried answering back.
At this point the Prophet got up. Abu Bakr (may Allah be pleased with him) asked him, “Are you displeased with me, O Messenger of Allah?” The Prophet replied, “No, but (when you remained silent) an angel came down from the heaven responding to this man’s talk. But the moment you started replying to that man, the angel went away and the devil sat down. And I cannot sit where the devil is sitting.” Abu Dawood 041 4878.

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Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "The strong man is not one who is good at wrestling, but the strong man is one who controls himself in a fit of rage.'' (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).

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Sulaiman bin Surad (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I was sitting with the Prophet (PBUH) when two men began to quarrel and curse each other and the face of one of them turned red and the veins of his neck were swollen (from rage). Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "I know of a word, if he were to utter that, his rage would vanish and that is: Audhu billahi minash-Shaitan ir-rajim (I seek refuge with Allah from Satan, the accursed).'' So they (Companions) said to him: "The Prophet (PBUH) tells you to utter: 'I seek refuge with Allah from Satan, the accursed". (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).

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Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man asked the Prophet (PBUH) for an advice and he (PBUH) said, "Do not get angry". The man repeated that several times and he replied, "Do not get angry". (Al-Bukhari).

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In the end, it's the Muslims who are at loss... because of our own actions! We need to set examples instead of being sore thumbs. Patience, or Sabr, is an important quality that every single one of us needs to work on. Don't say you're "patient" already. RW probably thought he had all the patience in the world. Let's try to actually practice our religion, for a change.

Salaam